Rosh Hashanah -Sharing the holiday with our elders

As we enter the New Year, how do we share this time with family when we can’t be with them in person. Carol Silver Elliott, the CEO and President of the Jewish Home Family, suggests the following:

“How do we bridge that divide this year? How do we keep our elders from feeling alone and our children and grandchildren from losing the opportunity to build a memory? Rather than sit alone at our holiday tables, this is the year to connect with elders virtually, either before or during the holiday. Ask them about their holiday memories, to share a story of holidays in their youth. Record it or jot down notes and take screen shots. Ask them what they hope the coming year will bring. Give the children and grandchildren an opportunity to share their own holiday wishes with the elder. Maybe it’s a video greeting card, maybe there are cards or drawings or crayoned pictures, maybe there are photos as the family gathers that can be sent to the older adult, either via mail or electronically. We must find ways to hold onto what’s important and not let the virus have this victory. COVID has already taken far too much from us and from our elders.” https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/a-new-year/

Let’s all create some new memories by sharing our elders’ memories of holiday celebrations from their youth. Let’s keep the oral tradition of generation to generation going strong.

Have a safe and healthy New Year.

Divorce Mediation: Confidentiality in Mediation “What’s said in mediation, stays in mediation.”

One of the reasons for choosing mediation for your divorce instead of litigation is the confidentiality of the mediation process. In litigation, everything is open to the public. Court appearances are open to the public and pleadings and documents filed with the court, are for the most part, accessible to the public.

Mediation is favored by the Courts and that public policy has resulted in rules, laws and case law holding the mediation process confidential. The mediator cannot be compelled to testify on behalf of either party in court, nor to submit to depositions. The confidentiality of the process is to assure the parties that full disclosure will be made during the mediation process and the parties don’t have to worry that what they say in mediation will be used against them later in court.

Confidentiality is important to high profile clients, as well as clients who do not want their dirty laundry aired in public or to have their clients, associates or friends know that they are in the process of getting divorced.

When you come to me to mediate your divorce, you sign a confidentiality agreement before proceeding with the mediation. Such an agreement adds an additional layer of protection to insure the confidentiality of the disclosures made during mediation.

I look forward to assisting you with your divorce and to working together with you in a confidential environment to reach a fair and equitable resolution of your marital dissolution issues.

National Healthcare Decisions Day

April 16 is National Healthcare Decisions Day.  This day is a reminder of the importance for each of us to articulate our medical wishes now in case we can’t speak for ourselves later and to share them with those who matter. It is also a reminder to call our parents, older loved ones and friends and discuss with them how important it is for them to let others know of their medical wishes.

Use April 16th as a day to think about your own healthcare decisions and update your advance directive/living will if needed.  If you don’t have a proxy for healthcare and a living will, use this day to think about those documents and contact an attorney to begin the process of preparing them.

If discussion of these issues is uncomfortable to have with your parents and siblings, call me to schedule a family mediation so that all interested family members can participate in the discussion in a non-threatening and confidential environment.

 

 

Being Kind

I just read a blog written by Carol Silver Elliott, President and CEO of the Jewish Home Family and wanted to share it with you.  To Be Kind, http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/to-be-kind/

Caregiver Stress

During the holiday season many family caregivers experience additional stress. Not only is the caregiver dealing with the usual day to day care of a loved one, but the holidays themselves are stressful with the added worries about gifting, entertaining and end of year planning.

Family mediation is available to help caregivers discuss the situation in a safe, non-judgmental environment with other family members. By participating in the mediation, family members who are visiting for the holidays can get a better perspective on how the caregiver of their loved one is trying to cope and perhaps how they can best assist.

Please call me if you wish to schedule a family mediation. In the meantime I refer you to the following article from Alzheimer’s NJ, http://www.alznj.org/managing-caregiver-stress-holidays/.